Hey {{first_name}}
If you’ve ever tried a breathing exercise, a sensory activity, or a calming strategy with your child…and they looked at you like, “Nope, not doing that,” this email is for you.
Kids don’t tend to want to spend their free time participating in regulation strategies even if they really need them.
And honestly?
Most adults don’t either. When was the last time you meditated?
But with a few simple shifts, you can make emotional + sensory regulation something kids want to do, not something you have to convince them to do.
Here’s how 👇
✨ 1. Model it first
Kids learn regulation through co-regulation and modeling, not instructions.
If we want them to use a tool, they need to see us using it consistently.
Instead of:
“Do your deep breathing!”
Try:
“I’m feeling angry because I was stuck in traffic and was late to my meeting, I’m going to do my flower breaths. Want to do them with me?”
Or:
“My body needs a movement break for more energy. I’m going to do some wall-pushups, can you help me?”
The more you model it in everyday moments, the safer it feels for them to join in.
✨ 2. Make it goal-oriented and based on their interests
As occupational therapists, we try to incorporate our clients’ interests in every single activity during sessions.
Kids participate more when the strategy is:
Goal-oriented (there’s a purpose, not random)
Linked to their interests (Pokemon, dinosaurs, cars, animals or whatever else they love)
Instead of:
“Jump 10 times, it will get your energy out.”
Try:
“Let’s do Pokémon Jumps: I’ll point to a character on the wall, and you jump to tag it!”
Instead of:
“Just run around.”
Try:
“Let’s do slow animal walks to bring our bodies from feeling wiggly to focused. Want to be a sloth or a kangaroo?”
Kids want to participate when it feels fun and meaningful.
💡 This is exactly why I built sensory cards with goal-oriented activities into my brand new Sensory Guide, releasing NEXT WEEK (🎉) . So you’re no longer randomly picking a strategy you found online. (It’s also why there’s a sensory quiz… so activities match your child’s unique needs.)
👉 Get early bird access by joining the waitlist.
✨ 3. Practice when they’re calm (not in the moment of a meltdown…)
No child learns a new strategy mid-meltdown. Their brain literally can’t access the part responsible for reasoning, imitation, or problem-solving.
So instead, keep the practice light and fun during neutral moments.
This is when you’ll learn:
What they enjoy
What actually helps their body (yes, there will be some trial and error involved)
What they’re willing to repeat when feelings become overwhelming.
Think of it like rehearsing before the show: we practice tools in calm moments so they’re available in hard ones. Once you start to notice subtle signs of dysregulation, you can offer them a choice between two strategies you know they like: “Do you want to do some steamrollers or pom-pom race?”).
🍽️ Bonus Picky Eating Tip: Give them a sense of control
Just like with regulation strategies, kids can participate more in eating when they feel some control.
You don’t need to ask, “What do you want for dinner?” (it’s your responsibility to decide, not theirs!).
Instead, offer guided choices that still give them a sense of autonomy:
“Do you want your veggies on the blue plate or the green one?”
“Should we put the pasta in the big bowl or the small bowl?”
“Want to pick one vegetable of the week at the grocery store?”
“Should our family meal of the week be tacos or stir fry?”
These small choices keep things empowering for them. When kids feel even a little in control, they may be more open to exploring, touching, smelling, and eventually tasting foods without pressure.
As always, reply to this email or send me a DM if you have any questions (:
You’ve got this,
Effie
